Life in my 20s and early 30s revolved around my job as a clinical researcher. I identified with myself as an intellectual person with two university degrees, who had a stimulating job which enabled me to use my mind, travel the world, explore science, meet interesting people and therefore, through my job, I could reinforce the view of myself as an intellectual academic person. This is who I thought I was; it was really the only identity I had ever created of myself.
I only knew myself as this person who was the same person that others could see, hear and touch. My self-worth was also completely tied up in how well I did my job as it was the only measure I had of myself. Because I viewed myself as an academic person, I had to reinforce this with outcomes at this level and so pushed myself mentally to achieve this.
When I got sick in my early 30s I could no longer work. My whole identity was taken away from me. Even my new identity as a mother of 2 young children was taken from me because I was not well enough to physically take care of my children’s needs.
I became depressed because I did not know how to live in this world without my identity. I did not know who I was or how to function in the world anymore. I did not know my place or my worth.
When my identity was taken from me; who I thought I was turned out to be an illusion tied up in the external world. I had to set out to find out who I really was – not an employee, student, mother, daughter, wife or any of those roles, but who I was inside – the part of me that was always constant no matter what was happening in the external world. Finding the real me – who I was at soul level, not only helped me out of the depression so I could function in the world, but it enabled me to thrive in the world because I had such a clear knowledge of who I authentically was.
It is usually when things don’t go to plan in our lives or when we are suffering, that we realise who we thought we were, was just an illusion – it was a reality that we created but it was not the reality that was created from or connected to our soul, it was a reality connected to our ego and the outside world. It is then we need to look deeper within to connect to our true selves.
If we only identify with the part of us that feels like it is suffering because of a loss of identity or because of what is happening to us in the outside world, then we create more suffering. The way out of this suffering is to travel inward towards the soul and find the truth of who we are so we can bring this truth out into our world.
Through my personal story and my experiences, I have learned how to find out who I am, and how to live as that person in my world and create my reality via my soul self (not via my outside world). Everything I now write about, teach and facilitate with my clients has to do with finding who we are and being who we are. This is the most important thing we can do for ourselves – simply get to know ourselves at a deep authentic soul level.
If you are ready to discover your soul self and learn how to bring this part of you into the world and into your reality, you are invited to join the soul gifts e-course which starts on Monday 12th September.
I believe that knowing who we are at our unique soul level holds the key to living an authentic and joyful life. Once we know who we are, we can begin to BE who we are, and then BECOME who we were always destined to be.